Parenting Counseling & Co-Parenting Counseling

What is Parenting Counseling and Co-Parenting Counseling?

At the simplest level, parenting counseling, also referred to as parenting therapy, is just “help with your child.” This form of therapy is not only short-term, it can also include all loved ones, you and your spouse, you and your child, or just you. Each treatment plan is specific to the situation. It doesn’t matter if the conflict lies between you and your child, or if it has to do with family trauma or child-related developmental, physical, or mental health problems; counseling sessions can provide you with the support and resources you need to be the best parent possible.

During parenting counseling, you learn the tools needed to function optimally within your family unit. More specifically, parenting counselors provide you with the guidance and support you need to provide a stable and healthy childhood experience for your child. The truth is, people tend to assume that parenting just comes naturally, when for most it doesn’t.

The truth is having children and understanding how to parent are two totally different things. And, even if you have a good understanding of what it takes to be a good parent, it doesn’t necessarily mean you can avoid the challenges that often accompany it. To be honest, there is no such thing as a “perfect parent.” It’s a myth like a unicorn or dragon.

We all make mistakes, which is why parenting counseling may be the best decision you’ll ever make. This type of counseling addresses a multitude of issues, ranging from postpartum depression to domestic violence. Therefore, engaging in parenting counseling can be extremely beneficial – not only for yourself, but for your children and your partner.

Co-parenting counseling is essentially the opposite of marriage counseling. With marriage counseling, parties attempt to save their marriage. With co-parenting counseling, the marriage is over, but the parties still need help in improving their mutual abilities to work together after divorce, as co-functioning joint parents on child-related issues.

Co-parenting counseling is not designed to unnecessarily dwell on events of the past, or to put blame on either party for the failed marriage or the divorce. Rather, co-parenting counseling is designed to look forward rather than backward, and to help both parties peacefully co-exist in a way where they can address issues concerning their children without having to spend endless time, money, and negative energies on unnecessary battles and repeated return trips to court after divorce.

What is Considered a Good Parent?

The truth is there is no shame in seeking parenting counseling. And, if you decide to do so, it doesn’t mean you are a “bad parent.” The decision to work with a parenting counselor just means that you are brave enough to ask for help. In fact, turning to a parenting counselor is the first step in providing your children with stability, while acquiring the support you need to be the best parent you can be. Honestly, one of the best ways to be a “good parent” is to simply love your children unconditionally.

According to the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, the main responsibilities of a parent include the following:

What are the Primary Goals of Parenting Counseling?

Children tend to adopt the views, beliefs, and behaviors of their parents. In other words, as a parent, you are your child’s first teacher. He/she looks to you to see what’s appropriate behavior and what is not. You may not realize it, but your child is always watching and listening to you – how you respond to situations and what you say in them. So, because children mimic their parents’ behaviors, it’s imperative that you always model healthy behaviors in front of your child.

Truth-be-told, always modeling positive behaviors is not an easy feat, especially when you are faced with adversity, stress, and boundless challenges. But, even under ideal circumstances, you are still human, and thus, bound to make mistakes. That is normal. Remember this, you won’t “ruin” your child, if you make mistakes. Rather, use your mistakes as “teachable moments.” In other words, teach your child that it’s ok to mess up from time-to-time, and it’s ok to ask for help when one needs it.

What Happens During a Parenting Counseling Session?

During a parent counseling session, you and your counselor set specific goals for you to accomplish. These goals depend on your specific situation. However, a common goal for many parents is being able to address and resolve “adult problems” in a healthy way, so their children are not negatively impacted by them. Keep in mind that to improve your ability to effectively “deal” with stressors, anxiety, and difficult situations, you must first admit that there is indeed a problem. It is important not to skip past this stage. The truth is, seeking counseling takes courage. It also puts you one step closer to finding a realistic solution to your problems.

During the initial counseling session, your parenting counselor will spend time “getting to know you” and “breaking the ice.” Then, he/she will ask you why you decided to seek counseling. Next, you and your counselor will talk about what you’d like to see accomplished from counseling, while helping you set realistic goals, so you can achieve your desired outcome.

Subsequent sessions will work towards achieving your goals, improving communication, and strengthening your conflict-resolution skills. Sessions may include just you or it may include the whole family. Moreover, your counselor may want to see you alone for some sessions and your whole family for some sessions. You will be giving parenting exercises to complete and you will share your experiences during sessions.